Velinwood Kitchens: A Collection of Chaos Cooking, Pasta Cosmology, and the Structural Significance of Noodles

THE VELINWOOD KITCHENS

Chaos Cooking, Pasta Cosmology,

and Why Nothing Is Safe

Inside this book you'll find:

Coffee experiments gone wrong (thermodynamically)

Oatmeal that shouldn't exist (but did)

A sandwich we're not discussing (seriously)

Black holes explained through noodles (accurately)

Architecture made from pasta (temporarily)

A formal portrait of said pasta (permanently)

A ballad about all of it (unfortunately)

One documentarian's descent into madness (ongoing)

WARNING: This book contains pasta, physics, performance art, and one very tired Bunny.

READER REVIEWS:

"Surprisingly accurate cosmology through carbohydrates." — Bunny (under duress)

"BAM!! PASTA!!" — Emma (enthusiastically)

"A triumph of form over function." — Velin (philosophically)

"I wrote a ballad about it." — Reginald (of course you did)

"It made me think about coffee differently." — Faith (somehow)

"The glitter oatmeal should come back." — Fire (no)

"I've filed this under 'Evidence.'" — Sir Percival (naturally)

"This is what my reign has become." — The Queen (accepting fate)

NOW AVAILABLE WHEREVER RIDICULOUS BOOKS ARE SOLD

(Also available in the Great Hall, framed next to the Penne Portrait)